Friday, March 07, 2014

BREAKING: FL House Comes Through! We Can Now Eat Pop Tarts into Shapes!

Crossposted on Dkos
#98 of My Stupid State

First off, yes, that is a true headline.

While you dolts are bickering about nonissues like our state's license to kill, or losing Billions of dollars in Medicaid funding, our teabagger Florida House is busy tackling the real issues facing our state: like allowing children to eat poptarts into "L" shapes":

The House Education Committee on Thursday gave its support to the bill, (HB 7029, SB 1060), which would prevent children from being disciplined for playing with simulated weapons in school.

The bill offers special protection for “brandishing a partially consumed pastry or other food.”

There you have it. Finally, some leadership. I guess those of you thinking our legislature wasn't looking out for us are feeling PRETTY stoopid right about now...

By the way, notice that the article had to put the qualifier in that the NRA was not "driving" this particular bill... because that is such a fucking rarity.

No, the author of that bill is an NRA shill named Dennis Baxley from Ocala. He is also the same guy who wrote "Stand Your Ground"--another poor solution to a problem we never had.

While this piece of crap zipped through committee, this $50 billion idea is having trouble: of the most important issues facing this state is stalled — one that would invigorate our economy, create more than 100,000 jobs and help save lives....

The federal government has agreed to help fund the cost of expanding Medicaid coverage to more low-income Americans. The results would be profound. Estimates show that about a million Floridians who make poverty wages or just a bit above — $27,000 for a family of three — would qualify for coverage...

States that accept the money also expect to see jobs skyrocket when the health-care dollars come. The University of Florida predicted 120,000 new jobs for the Sunshine State. That's why groups such as the Florida Chamber of Commerce have advocated taking the money, as well.

So why don't we have the money?

Because House Speaker Will Weatherford and a handful of his GOP peers would rather demagogue the politics of "Obamacare" than help the state's economy or its residents.

It's particularly ironic, considering these same politicians get generous taxpayer-subsidized health-care plans ... and considering Weatherford's own family received Medicaid assistance when he was a child.


Who the fuck wants that?

Real Floridians want their reps to make sure we tackle the real issues...

We want them defending our freedoms, be it keeping UN troops from taking Florida land, protecting us from those who would assault our right to "brandish" pastry in a theatening manner, or from the imaginary hordes involved with in-person voting fraud.

I just wish they'd hurry up and make a bill protecting us from alien abductions, becuase unlike the other things I just mentioned, there's at least one report in Florida of that ever actually happening.

Thank you, Florida. I think... You know what.. I can't do this.

I usually go into a sarcastic snark about the sheer stupidity, but its gotten so bad that the special brand of stupid in Tallahassee is LITERALLY killing Floridians. Six a day to be exact. Our friends, family, and neighbors dying needlessly in a futile attempt to... what exactly? To thumb your nose at a black guy in Washington? How's that going?

When they do get around to enacting laws, its stupid crap like this--or worse, something that hurts people. The teabaggers who run Tally are particularly fond of pissing off minorities, especially Hispanics--that is if they aren't trying to literally kill them.

Honestly, I'm sick to my stomach. (Maybe that's why I'm sick.) I made a fraking list that's almost at 100 documenting the stupid, and I still miss things every day because if I wrote about everything I heard about or what people send me I'd have to quit my damn job and just do that fulltime.

If you know me, you know I have my own health issues, but I don't have it as bad as many people I meet. I met a wonderful woman yesterday who broke down in the clinic because she couldn't get healthcare for her family. This state has made it difficult to be a navigator and refused to set up its own exchange. I promised to help if I could: (By the way, if ANYONE here is a navigator or knows the system, let me know so we can help her.)

I have nothing to gain by living here. I'm tired of neighbors like this, and my own idiot, child-like representative, the corrupt, creepy kid who runs the House,and the legion of assholes we somehow think are worth paying to screw us.

You teabags apparently are intent on turning this tropical paradise into Somalia, but with abortion restrictions. You know what? Fucking have at it. South Florida should annex itself, and every normal sane person should leve Central and North and migrate elsewhere.

This ain't normal.

I'll be on hiatus for a few weeks. In the meantime, Maxwell recommends calling the Florida House. I hope you will:

Will Weatherford (aka creepy kid) office at 850-717-5038
His facebook is
The legisaltive Switchboard at 850-717-5650

Please contact them. The only thing worse than the corruption and stupidity of our leaders is the apathy of the people here to confront them. Until that changes, nothing will.

1 comment :

  1. Calling reps is one avenue, but really, we need a lot more. Too many of these tea Party loons are running unopposed, or with token opposition. We also need a lot more information being passed around. I imagine I could make a list of at least 50-100 reasons each that a number of those loons deserve dis-election.

    But inevitably, they will collapse on themselves, because the basis of the Tea Party is selfishness. That means they'll end up either changing to keep votes, or being defeated as they continue to hurt people. Their selfishness will end up being their own epitaph. The advent of legalized medical marijuana may be one such example. This is an issue that brings out the compassion in people. You can't argue with the suffering of patients, and in practical terms, we've been doing similar things with otherwise illegal drugs for years (look at how many medications are derived from opium), so you can't argue by precedent. The selfish ones will either have to change their public stance, like Gaetz did, or get kicked out -- as will likely happen to Scott.

    Everyday Tea Party people will have no one but themselves to blame. They will have fostered their defeat because of their own extremism. Crist tells in his book how the change was made from bipartisan compromise to "my way or the highway". It may take a while, and there will always be holdouts, but gradually, they'll end up on the highway, especially as FL becomes more "blue".